Friday, December 2, 2011

What a Lucky Man


he WAS
Page 53

October 1986
Anna came into my room with a worried look upon her face, Debra on her heels; “Dianne, Jackie flew the kids up to my parents” Anna was angry “My mother and dad said they were going to keep the kids until you went back to Jackie.”

She proceeded to tell me of how she, for obvious, reasons did not approve of the person I chose, but not the reason or lifestyle. She could not, in right conscience, allow them to take my kids. Her father had set that one off when he made a big deal out of Trey being gay.  It was not lost on her that he only worried about Trey, but that was a minor issue in the scheme of things.  She then decided that I would drive - yes she bartered with Jackie and said I would drive for three days with him. Then I was to act like we were going to reunite. Anna would take care of everything when we got back.
And I still continued with Debra

Now you may wonder why I keep up this self- flagellation, it is because I feel today that somehow, I must deserve what happened to me last year, the ultimate plot of this blog. And it must have started then, some 25 years ago.  I just viewed the story “Diary of a Mad Black Woman”.   I could barely make it through the first 5 minutes.  It was a re-enactment of the incident last year, VERBATIM.  So I must come to terms and admit what I did all those years ago in order to make sense of such a terrible punishment.
So Jackie and I made the trip, with a little too much affection on Jackie’s part. And now, he had TWO genders to be jealous of. And he was. I sported a black eye for giving the woman who cut his hair during the trip, a nice tip. That was a disappointment, as I was starting to enjoy this change of venue. A fist to the face certainly puts everything in perspective.
When we got to Chicago, we met up with three other couples we always hung with, Chuck and Marylee Gallagher, Debbie and John Neifhanger, and Mark and Mary Schubert. The men were as close as the women.
We were like the couples in the movie Four Seasons:
We took a boat trip on Fox Lake in John’s boat. While the 3 women and I were together in the cabin,  Debbie burst out, faster than the other two, but it was a burst…"WHAT is GOIN ON? "
“We have never seen Jackie act so sweet to you, what’s the deal”? Debbie asked
“I had an affair,” I responded all geared up for SHOCK VALUE
“Oh. My. God. And he didn’t try to kill you?” Mary asked.
“At first, it was uncomfortable…”
“With who? Do we know him?” two, I don’t know which two asked.
‘mysisterinlawslover” as fast as I could say it.
And for fucks sake, no one was surprised.
“Oh, I can see that” Debbie said checking out her manicure “The only time I felt that way was when I was with Dianne”.
Hmmm, ok, it sounds like Bullshit, with a capital B, and that is why I put their real names. If you know any of these people, go ahead and ask them, it was memorable enough.  (oh, and please put them in touch.) And hearing that this 5’9” gorgeous blonde wanted to have a relationship with me was an ego booster, I needed to ignore.
“Don’t tell me…” Debbie continued “Nancy doesn’t know, does she? What am I saying , of course she does”
These friends did not welcome Nancy, my best friend, into the group. I have no idea what it was, her, her husband, whatever. But when we went places and I insisted on bringing her, they would all do a collective sigh. Sometimes I would just forget it, but other times I insisted and everything appeared fine. But in retrospect...maybe not.
“Yes, she knows, and the answer for the next question is also yes” I smiled
“Oh… I don’t even want to know the details”
And for Debbie, this was strange since she was always interested in other’s sexual proclivities.
“It figures, she always hoarded your attention, what makes this any different.”
"If it makes you feel better, I fell asleep”.  Which I did.
And with that, the subject was dropped and we all carried on as if nothing had happened.  Except the sideways glances the women gave me.  Yet these woman, they were the very few that became part of this whole.  We were truly loyal to each other. We absolutely never backstabbed each other, never fought and all of us were there for the others.  A true gift. I wish they were part of my life today. What am I saying, I may not see them, but they are truly a part of me , today.
Sunday, we went to Dinner with my father -in-law. I said little, enjoying the first worry free meal in days. But leave it to Jack Sr.
“Do you want your son to grown up to be a lesbian?”
Tragedy plus time equals comedy. Watch any episode of Southpark and you’ll see.

I could not restrain a laugh, nor could Jackie. Lee had a fork of salad making way to her mouth. She stopped, her mouth still open, fork on pause mid air.
“You Jackass!” she dropped the fork and put her hands together resting her elbows on the table, her fists to her mouth, eyes down.
Before she could say anymore...
"He should be such a lucky man,” I said casually continuing my meal.
Jackie choked, Devo wanted to know what a lethbeen is “What about me, can I be a lethbeen?”
“See what I am saying” Jack was truly the epitome of idiot.
If he was worried about such a thing, why not worry about both of the children. But he had a special bond with
Trey, and woman were not worth his worry.
After all was said and done, we packed up the kids and headed home. Uneventful.
The first morning Jackie was at work. I tried to carry on, I DID carry on as I was before all of this. Cleaning house, preparing meals, yelling at the kids. I actually started to like it. I had no expectations of Anna and Debra, or even myself.

After all, I won’t have to worry about support, our lives wouldn’t be so fragmented. And perhaps we can discover each other again.
I pulled the black trash bag into the garage and out to the canisters in the alley. The garage door slowly opened revealing two pairs of legs Two familiar pair of legs….

to be continued


There you have it. In full color, my life.
I know, bad quality, but please watch it. This is the only way you can get the full gravity of why I started this blog to begin with.  I want you to be as incensed as everyone familiar with this story, is, still today. 

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